All change

It's now been a few weeks since I moved back to the UK so I will be posting my final few blog posts that I have written about my experiences. This one shares how I was feeling about leaving Zambia before I moved back…

Saying farewell at Kaniki

I'm not sure if it makes me a bit strange but I quite like change. Not horrendous life-altering difficulties of course, but I believe that lots of changes can be positive and bring about new opportunities.

Moving back to the UK will definitely be a big change for me. Although I’ve been back to visit, it was two and a half years ago since I was settled there and in the few years before that my life had changed a lot as a result of going through a divorce. When people ask how I’m feeling about the move back home, it’s tricky to answer.

Overall I am feeling positive and expecting the transition to be good. I’m also excited about it in fact. I am really looking forward to spending time with lots of friends and family who I have not been able to see much over the last couple of years. I’m looking forward to being part of family celebrations and friends' birthdays and all kinds of other events that I’ve missed. I am also looking forward to living on the same continent as my boyfriend.

Catching up with friends in the UK

I recently watched a movie which was set in London and it reminded me lots of things that I love about British culture and the UK. I’m looking forward to eating good cake and puddings, enjoying light summer evenings and barbecues, sitting in front of a cosy fire when it’s cold, going for walks in the countryside and even having decent WiFi. I am glad there will be less bugs, snakes and power cuts at home. I look forward to the convenience of being able to walk to places or drive on smooth roads, and being able to pop to the shop or order pretty much anything online.

Welcome home cake - my friends know me well!

However, there are numerous things that I will miss about Zambia. Most importantly I will miss the people who have become my friends and I will be particularly sad to leave the wonderful children from Kapumpe and Arise. They are such fun to be around and never fail to bring a smile to my face. I will also hugely miss the constant sunshine, beautiful sunsets, swimming in the outdoor pool, a more relaxed attitude to life, and the friendliness of people who take time to greet you whether they know you or not. I will also miss my little dog who I adopted in Zambia and will have to go to a new owner here when I move home.

With colleagues and friends 

Archie waving goodbye 

I imagine it will feel quite strange not having petrol attendants at petrol stations waiting to fill up the tank for me, or people ready to pack my shopping for me in the supermarket like there are in Zambia. I know I will find it hard to say goodbye to the amazing children and staff I've worked with here, and living so far away whilst knowing some of the challenges they are facing will be hard. But just because something is hard doesn't mean it's not what you should do. Living in Zambia has had many challenges. Life is not as straightforward here, but the initial adventure that has become my normal life has been a wonderful, life-changing experience. 

Some of the lovely children at Kapumpe 

Having thoroughly enjoyed the challenge of working for a charity in Zambia, I’m now looking for a job in the 'third sector' (charity). I’m motivated to try something new, find something I’m passionate about and hopefully use what I’ve learned, to make a difference in a different setting.

When I get home, will things continue as they were? I don’t think so. Hopefully I will follow a different career and I’ll live in a different house, possibly even a different city. But not only that. A friend told me to remember that everyone else’s lives will have moved on as well as mine. Because of this and because my experiences have changed me, things will be different. But change can be good! I have been hugely challenged about my attitude to the poor, to be generous with the resources I have, to consider ethical issues more and about the importance of empowering others. These things will definitely be on my conscience as I settle into another ‘new normal’ life. 

At Ndola airport 

I hope this blog post gives you a flavour of my mixed emotions. Yet I know in it all that God has a purpose for the things he leads us to do. When we look back we often see opportunities that particular situations brought about. And just to add word of warning…for those I see when I have moved back home, I may talk a lot as I process my amazing experiences. I hope you will be gracious and allow me to reminisce about Zambia!

As one chapter closes, a new chapter opens. And with every ending there is a new beginning.

Looking for a sponsor for the lovely Lawrence

My sister Rhi couldn't keep away from Zambia this year either! She made her third trip to Kaniki to spend two weeks with me before we travelled back to the UK together. You may remember that she's an Occupational Therapist so last year spent some time supporting Lawrence, one of the pupils at Kapumpe. Here she provides an update on his progress and explains why we are now hoping to find him a sponsor...

Rhi with Lawrence and some of his friends

Last summer I wrote a blog post about Lawrence, a student at Kapumpe who has cerebral palsy. This year I returned to Kapumpe and met Lawrence again. He is now in Grade 2, running around school confidently on crutches and still as happy as ever. When doing Lawrence’s exercises with him, I noticed that he seemed much stronger and more flexible than he was last year. Lawrence and his father told us that they have been doing the exercises with him at home, and that he has been walking at home with his crutches rather than crawling which is how he had moved around previously.

Confident on crutches

Grade 2 at Kapumpe

When I returned to Kapumpe, his Grade 2 teacher told me that unfortunately Lawrence has missed a significant amount of school due to the weather – the rainy season runs from November to April in Zambia. Last summer Rosie and I visited Lawrence and his family and saw how rural their home is. It helped us to see and understand why any wet weather or problems with their bike prevents Lawrence from attending school. Lawrence is such a happy and motivated student so it’s frustrating to see how these factors impact his education.

Ellie with Lawrence's teacher

Lawrence’s Grade 2 teacher is physically disabled herself, and was supported by Arise to attend a school in town for children with physical disabilities. She has been teaching at Kapumpe since the school began in 2014, and has defied the usual expectations for people with disabilities in her community. This is something we want for Lawrence. After discussing the situation with his teacher and Lawrence’s father, Arise and Kapumpe teams are considering whether this school in town would be more beneficial for Lawrence. He would be able to board at the school and therefore eliminate the problems he has with attendance, and there would be physiotherapy available on site and access to a doctor for any medical issues that may arise.

Lawrence's parents

Unfortunately Lawrence’s family are not in a position to be able to afford this school. Whilst we see their commitment in bringing Lawrence such a distance to school and in doing his exercises at home, they have struggled to contribute to the hugely discounted fees that Kapumpe has charged so far. Therefore we are looking for a kind-hearted person who would be interested in sponsoring £25 per month to enable Lawrence to attend this specialist school in town. If you would be interested in helping or would like more information please feel free to get in touch.

Lawrence loving the slide

Life’s Not Fair!

My grandpa often used to say, “Life’s not fair!". Sometimes this would be in reference to me being able to eat lots of pudding and cake but not seeming to put on weight. I didn’t mind too much about life not being fair in this regard! I just continued to enjoy all things sweet.

My grandpa Howard with my cousin

Recently I was thinking about this saying when I saw one of our elderly guardians doing some piece work in the school grounds. He was spending the day slashing grass, which is physically very demanding in the hot sunshine, as well as being an extremely monotonous job. For a day's work, he will earn 25 kwacha (just under £2.50). 

Slashing grass

Recently the man turned up for work late and said it was because he was cooking nshima for his wife who is physically unable to cook for herself. One of the Zambian members of our Arise team told him off and emphasised that if he wants to work he must prioritise it and get up earlier to cook for his wife so that he can get to work on time. I felt bad for him knowing his circumstances, but the next day he turned up on time and did the job with more dignity. He was glad for the opportunity to earn some money. We made sure we provided a decent lunch for him because it’s one way we can help him whilst still keeping in line with local wages.

The gentleman with his wife and one of their friends

This man is one of the guardians in our Arise project. He lives with his elderly wife who suffered a stroke some years ago, leaving her unable to speak properly or use one side of her body. She shuffles around the house or sits outside, and uses a wheelchair around the village. They are guardians to two young boys, their grandchildren. The boys’ mother (their daughter) is an alcoholic who doesn’t look after her sons and sadly their father abandoned the family.

Visiting the family

Life is without doubt difficult for this family. It is a daily struggle to provide food, even though Arise helps a little with this. Bringing up the boys is a challenge; as they are young they have lots of energy and no experience of boundaries – they wander around the village rather than spending their free time at home. Although it isn’t legal, it is culturally acceptable here to beat children and this is the only punishment method that many adults are aware of, or believe to be effective.

The boys are sponsored through Arise to attend Kapumpe Christian Primary School 

This particular family live in a small house in a rural, impoverished area next to the Congolese border. The majority of homes in this area are small mud brick and thatched houses. The houses are in close proximity to each other and the area is densely populated. It is a close-knit community and the HIV rate is said to be 50%. 

A typical house in the area

So whilst this gentleman was slashing grass, I returned to the Arise office after having a nice lunch in my own apartment. I thought about how I have been able to choose to move to another country and use my education and experiences to do a job of my choice. Life most certainly isn’t fair.

Arise office

Sometimes it is difficult to reconcile the way that people live in such different economic circumstances, particularly when it does not seem to be due to any choice they themselves have made. One of the things that helps me to live with this unfairness is the belief that this life is not all there is. I recently read a great book by Andrew and Rachel Wilson called ‘The Life You Never Expected’ (2015), which explores faith and suffering. They suggest that, "although we’re not able to imagine a world where all suffering is made up for, that doesn’t mean that it couldn’t happen, it just means our minds are limited".

I know not everyone will find solace in this or agree with my view. But a hope of heaven is how I live with the discomfort of life not being fair. This is described in a poignant quote from the Russian novel, 'The Brothers Karamazov': 

I believe like a child that suffering will be healed and made up for, that all the humiliating absurdity of human contradictions will vanish like a mindful pitful mirage...that in the world's finale, at the moment of eternal harmony, something so precious will come to pass that it will suffice for all hearts, for the comforting of all resentments, for the atonement of all crimes of humanity, of all the blood they've shed; that it will make it not only possible to forgive but to justify all that has happened.

Children in the village